Jeff Brazier has revealed how Celebrity Race Across the World turned into a personal voyage of discovery for him, and led him to face up to a mistake that made him feel “ashamed” of being too competitive, rather than making the most of quality time with his son.
In the show, Jeff teamed with his youngest child Freddy to complete an epic 12,500-kilometre journey from Belem, Northern Brazil to Frutillar at the southern tip of Chile.
He says he was so determined to beat rival celebs Kelly Brook and her husband Jeremy, Scott Mills and his husband Sam, and Kola Bokinni and his cousin Mary Ellen, that he missed out on some amazing sights and experiences.
Because, at the age of 45, he feels he still has “something to prove,” the former Leyton Orient defender says he sacrificed some lifetime opportunities just for a chance at winning the race.
Ahead of his appearance on another celebrity reality jaunt this week – Pilgrimage: The Road Through the Alps, Jeff told the Inside A Mind podcast: “I was so competitive, to the point where ……at the end… you think ‘Why didn’t I go to the Iguazú Falls? Why didn’t I go to Curitiba and do that incredible railway journey through the mountains?
“It didn’t make sense that I’d chosen to just go more direct because it was more important not to lose ground. I felt a bit ashamed of that, and I felt like there was no logic involved in that whatsoever.”
Jeff’s determination to make the best time saw him and Freddy win the second and third legs of the competition, but at the end of the series, they finished in third place overall, with Scott and Sam being crowned victors.
The dad-of-two says he’s now “adjusting” his attitude to life, and is determined not to make the same kind of mistake again.
He says it’s just one of the changes he’s trying to make to his thought process, explaining that he feels as if he’s in danger of losing a vital connection to his two sons, Freddy and Bobby.
“I’d lost the ability to be playful with my kids,” he says, “maybe because they’re getting a little bit older … rolling around on the floor with them was less possible.
“But actually being playful is a habit and a way of being … you can be in that headspace at any time.
“Race helped me learn that I could go back to being more playful, which is definitely something that I’ve worked on.”
Something else that’s preoccupying Jeff at the present is his legal battle with Jackiey Budden, his sons’ grandmother.
He reportedly tried to block Jackiey, mother of his late ex Jade Goody, from meeting with the boys, on the grounds that, in his opinion, she was adversely affecting their mental health.
He hasn’t spoken directly about the issue, but when asked asked if the recent spotlight on the family, has made life difficult he says simply: “All we really know how to do is to pull together and be there for one another…and I think that’s what we do best, and that’s what all good families do.”
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